Ask Dan & Jennifer

Originally posted by: dlove23
I've been recently talking to this girl. We've hung out a few times with friends, and we've been talking online the last couple of weeks. We joke around and talk about our similar taste in music. As a result, we've decided to get together and listen to various songs and artist. I'm not sure however where the best possible place to go is. It has to be somewhere that we can listen and sing songs out loud, but it shouldn't be somewhere too isolated, like a house; because we're not at that comfort level yet. What would be the best type of location?

Hi there,

You're doing this just right - you've gotten to know her already, then you've been talking online some to figure out something you both like so you can take it offline and get to really know one another in person. Awesome. This puts you so far ahead of most guys wanting to get close to a woman they're interested in.

I also love how you're taking this slow, wanting to make sure she's comfortable, i.e. looking for neutral ground for your first pseudo-date.

OK, to your question about your first date... where to go. Hmmm.... A concert probably wouldn't have enough variety for you and would be "too" loud, and a music store - even one where you can check out and listen to lots of songs/artists - is probably too "quiet". How about Karaoke or a piano bar?

Guys - any more ideas? Just reply to this thread.

Graveyard its a mood setter. Bring a blanket and some food.

Oh wow I don't believe I have ever used the graveyard one before. Lets see.. How about a restaurant that plays music you both like or maybe a coffee place with a music box. Bring your quarters and a bit of money. Pick out your music and hang out chat listen to music...

Depends on how much funds you have. I'm sure there is a lot of free things and then there is ways you can spend the money... I believe its always best to spend some money the first time around at least. To set the fact that its a date and you are man and she is woman.

Gaveyard, LOL. Points for creativity for sure!

Originally posted by: Kalim
I believe its always best to spend some money the first time around at least.

Just be careful of going "all out" and spending a lot of money on something that "feels" extravagant or very fancy can make you look desperate. Try to keep things on an equal and even setting.

Originally posted by: Kalim
To set the fact that its a date and you are man and she is woman.

Hmm... Modern women are equal to men especially in the Western world these days. Make sure to treat her as an equal and perfectly capable and competent person, not a "helpless woman". That's just not today's reality.

And I wouldn't focus too much on it being a "date"... you're a little early on for that. The less labels and expectations on it, the more you two have emotional freedom to get to know each other better and get closer... it's just "being together". it's ok to flirt, show her you like her, but no labels. :-)

Dan

I've always liked keeping things real simple. If you guys are going to do the whole music thing, I would find a nice little dive bar with a good juke box. Seriously, some of the best times I've had with girls is hanging out around a juke box in a shitty bar, picking songs, singing, dancing. It's not a classy place so it takes a lot of pressure off both of you and you'll be able to sing out loud without getting any hassle.