Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

in Sex and Intimacy » Sex Tips and Advice • 2 years ago

I discovered masturbation at fourteen years of age, not the youngest by any means, and I didn't even know it was masturbation until half a year later. That length of time made me, unaware of what I was doing, addicted, if you will, to the sensation.
For the last six years, I have been masturbating, no matter how hard I try to stop. I promise myself to not masturbate for a week, and fail by the second day, or go on holiday with my parents and find myself rushing to the bathroom or standing in front of a pool jet.

That's the end of the history. I was hoping someone could give me an idea of what I could do.
I'll just conclude by saying, no I am not religious; I do not percieve masturbation as a 'sin', it's just I see sex and love as different things; I never think of the sex aspect of a relationship until 'the time' and so never think of the woman/man I love. I just don't want to so much as talk to the woman (currently) I love until I stop.

Finally, I'm a male.

Replies(13)

Xero

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

Originally posted by: Jasperky
I just don't want to so much as talk to the woman (currently) I love until I stop.

I don't understand what you meant by the quote above.

For your masturbation issue I also started pretty young and didn't fully know. I as well had been doing it too much and it became out of control. I tried setting certain days of the week and only doing it then on those days only once. Which it seemed to work.

What your going to have to do is set a number of days for a week that you will do it. For every week that passes lower the number that you do it, so lets say you start 5 times a week once a day. So a week passes and this new week you will only do it on 4 set days. Work your way to only twice a week.

This is how I got it under control for my self and it pretty much works. I mean I relapse here and there but it is by no means out of control like it used to be. It might be 3-4 times a week some weeks and only 2-0 on others. But it is normally twice a week.

slittylic..

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

I don't understand.
Unless it is causing you or anyone else harm, why is it a problem?
It's not abnormal to masturbate every day. If there's nothing wrong with masturbating, why are you being so hard on yourself?
I could understand if you were doing it in inappropriate places, inappropriate times, injuring yourself, missing work, exposing yourself, doing it so much that you neglect priorities, etc. etc.
Ease up on yourself and cum if you feel like it. You are the only one who won't turn you down...unless you're trying to control your desire to do it.

jasperky

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

Originally posted by: slittylicker
I don't understand.
Unless it is causing you or anyone else harm, why is it a problem?
It's not abnormal to masturbate every day. If there's nothing wrong with masturbating, why are you being so hard on yourself?
I could understand if you were doing it in inappropriate places, inappropriate times, injuring yourself, missing work, exposing yourself, doing it so much that you neglect priorities, etc. etc.
Ease up on yourself and cum if you feel like it. You are the only one who won't turn you down...unless you're trying to control your desire to do it.

I'm not saying it's a problem; it's just that I was brought up thinking it was 'evil' etc and, while I don't believe that now, my basic beliefs mean I'm don't want to.
Note, I am an atheist, my beliefs, as mentioned, are:

Sex and love are different. Don't dwell on both except in the present tense
You can cheat on a partner even when you aren't close to them; your feelings mean that whatever you do can be considred infidelity, but whatever they do can't (hope that makes sense)

blowtopop..

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

I don't think it's a problem. I started when I was 12 and I had no clue of what I was doing. I'm 21 now and I felt that a couple years ago I was like you constantly masturbating. now I went from a history in which I did it once a month when I was 12 to now where I do it 3-5 times a week.. it varies from week to week it usually depends on how horny I am that week or what I was watching prior to masturbating usually . I don't have planned days usually for me anyway I masturbate 2 days in a row then take a break and do 2 more days in row than take a break. For the most part it balances within that 3-5 times. It's about balancing how much you really want to masturbate.

femaleorg..

Use emotional freedom techniques

2 years ago

Here's a video for you:

Use the phrase, "Even though I compulsively masturbate and I'm addicted to masturbation, I deeply and completely accept myself".

don_in_nyc

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

It's really tough and definitely an addiction. It's a habit and routine that you have formed which is what makes it seem difficult to break.

They say that it takes about 20 days to form a new habit, so maybe do your best to last for 20 days. Trying putting a porn filter on your computer etc. as well.

Try to find something else that you can do instead that will relax and distract you (maybe even video games or something?)

Good luck. And if you believe in God, you can always pray for His help. :o

rob_danje..

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

Interesting that you see sex and love as different things, and yet are addicted to masturbation. To me it seems that the key is willpower. You want to stop, otherwise you won't 'prove worthy' of her. Sorry for the psychoananlysis.
My advice is to concentrate on who you love, have some reminder (maybe have her picture as your desktop background) so you'll remember her. You need willpower. It's all very well cutting down, but without willpower, you'll be unable to be assured you'll stop.

Finally, to the people who wonder why he wants to stop; it's his morality. I don't agree with it myself, but I can easily see why someone would think like that.

jasperky

The Cause

2 years ago

I'm just wondering, does anyone know if depression could be a cause of compulsive masturbation?
I recently entered treatment for my depression, not taking any meds though so don't mention drugs, I'm only using a mental thought process whenever I feel depressed. After entering this treatment, i found a sudden lack of drive to masturbate. I was wondering if it was possible that depression was the cause?
Note: I'm a bi-polar depressive, if that helps. That's why I'm nauseatingly cheerful sometimes and depressed other times.

Xero

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

It could be but I'm not too sure.

It would release chemicals into the brain to make you feel better. You could have also been doing it to feel more acceptance in your life as you could succeed in something.

As long as you do it and its not hurting anyone or your self, and you don't neglect things that are important in your life its completely fine. It is also shown to reduce the chance of prostate cancer. "Use it or lose it".

I'm not really sure and am on the fence about it. Remember its just my opinion.

jasperky

Re: Compulsive Masturbation; How do I stop?

2 years ago

Originally posted by: Jasperky
I'm just wondering, does anyone know if depression could be a cause of compulsive masturbation?
I recently entered treatment for my depression, not taking any meds though so don't mention drugs, I'm only using a mental thought process whenever I feel depressed. After entering this treatment, i found a sudden lack of drive to masturbate. I was wondering if it was possible that depression was the cause?
Note: I'm a bi-polar depressive, if that helps. That's why I'm nauseatingly cheerful sometimes and depressed other times.

Please forget that last post, it helped for a few days, but then I was stimulated and...
Oh god I just sound so weak. I think the depression was the effect rather than the cause; I don't want to, and yet I have to.
And, to anyone who's going to give me a post about 'it's not so bad', don't bother. It is for me, so give up.

Xero