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Hi Dan & Jen,
Greetings from Malta (you know, that itsy bitsy island in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea) hehe :).. thanks for all your videos. i really find them helpful. this is my first thread ever and to be completely honest i'm not sure you can help me, but thought i'd give it a try, so here it goes:
I'd met my ex when I was 16 and he was my first love. I had dated before, but this guy was different and i immediately fell for him. We spent 2 years together and at the time i'd really thought we'd be together forever. But it didn't work out because we were so different. we had nothing in common, not even friends or family (my parents didn't want me dating him). Anyway, we broke it off and a couple of months later, we both had different partners. I am really happy with my current boyfriend, whom I've been together with for 6 months now, though I still think about my ex - and it's not for the reason you would think. I have no regrets - I don't miss him romantically and I would never want to get back together with him, cause it was so obvious we just couldn't ever work out as a couple. I just wonder if he's doing well every now and then, cause a part of me will always love him i guess.
Despite this, I could never see myself looking towards a solid future with my ex because our lifestyles were completely different, but i do with my current boyfriend. I really love my boyfriend, i have no doubt about that, but something in my gut keeps reminding me that it's like i let myself fall in love with him.. you know, seeing the beauty in the little things he does and appreciating his imperfections. it's like i learnt to love him and be happy with him because everything is so sweet and simple with him, whereas with my ex, even though we loved each other so intensely, it was all drama and we would never be able to make it work in the real world.
my sister and her husband are having marital problems, and i can understand why. they never had that kind of epic romance, that just takes your breath away. They were just comfortable together and learnt to love each other by being together. I really don't want to repeat her mistake. So what i'm asking i guess is, is it ok to let go and stop worrying about finding that intense love (or did that happen for the reason that he was my first love?), and just let myself be happy with this guy? or would i be just fooling myself and wasting his time? Cause it's as if my heart can't decide :( then i think about it and say.. my ex had my heart but not my mind, my dreams, my hopes while with my boyfriend it's like we have the perfect balance of everything - love, friends, family, we're both studying in college etc. (and he gives me butterflies, he really does :)) is it ok if i let myself be happy with my current boyfriend, even if maybe he's not 'the one' or should i settle for nothing less but that?
Greetings from Malta (you know, that itsy bitsy island in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea) hehe :).. thanks for all your videos. i really find them helpful. this is my first thread ever and to be completely honest i'm not sure you can help me, but thought i'd give it a try, so here it goes:
I'd met my ex when I was 16 and he was my first love. I had dated before, but this guy was different and i immediately fell for him. We spent 2 years together and at the time i'd really thought we'd be together forever. But it didn't work out because we were so different. we had nothing in common, not even friends or family (my parents didn't want me dating him). Anyway, we broke it off and a couple of months later, we both had different partners. I am really happy with my current boyfriend, whom I've been together with for 6 months now, though I still think about my ex - and it's not for the reason you would think. I have no regrets - I don't miss him romantically and I would never want to get back together with him, cause it was so obvious we just couldn't ever work out as a couple. I just wonder if he's doing well every now and then, cause a part of me will always love him i guess.
Despite this, I could never see myself looking towards a solid future with my ex because our lifestyles were completely different, but i do with my current boyfriend. I really love my boyfriend, i have no doubt about that, but something in my gut keeps reminding me that it's like i let myself fall in love with him.. you know, seeing the beauty in the little things he does and appreciating his imperfections. it's like i learnt to love him and be happy with him because everything is so sweet and simple with him, whereas with my ex, even though we loved each other so intensely, it was all drama and we would never be able to make it work in the real world.
my sister and her husband are having marital problems, and i can understand why. they never had that kind of epic romance, that just takes your breath away. They were just comfortable together and learnt to love each other by being together. I really don't want to repeat her mistake. So what i'm asking i guess is, is it ok to let go and stop worrying about finding that intense love (or did that happen for the reason that he was my first love?), and just let myself be happy with this guy? or would i be just fooling myself and wasting his time? Cause it's as if my heart can't decide :( then i think about it and say.. my ex had my heart but not my mind, my dreams, my hopes while with my boyfriend it's like we have the perfect balance of everything - love, friends, family, we're both studying in college etc. (and he gives me butterflies, he really does :)) is it ok if i let myself be happy with my current boyfriend, even if maybe he's not 'the one' or should i settle for nothing less but that?
