Ask Dan & Jennifer

I've been in your EXACT same situation before. My first sex partner was nothing special, and I never hit that big moment with him. Then, when I started dating the guy I am still with today, I wanted it to be absolutely perfect. But, since I was so worried about everything being perfect, I couldn't relax. I kept wondering if I was good enough for him and what he thought about me and a million other things that I couldn't have an orgasm. I didn't try doing anything on my own, like you're talking about, but after a few times, I was able to relax and it happened. SO- my advice to you, talk to him about this. It might seem personal, but if you're about to have sex with him, you should be able to talk about sex-related things with him. Tell him you've never had an orgasm before and you want to have one with him. When I finally decided to tell my guy this, he completely understood. He kept telling me to just relax and clear my head. Trust me, it'll happen.. just enjoy the special moment with him.