Ask Dan & Jennifer

Like you say you are young. How young we have no idea. Myself i would say no. He need to see where you are coming from. Since he is saying all the right things, biut are they really what you want. Need to think about this within yourself. Sure we can give you good or bad reason. But remember it you who must answer this question. My answer would be no, start looking for a new boy friend

Best of luck

Based on what you're saying, you're making age a pretty big factor in your situation. How old are you and how old is he?

If you move away and in with him, you are basically saying that you are ready to settle down with him. It's a big first step towards marriage (if you're the marrying type) and all that it implies.

What concerns me is that you write "I've just started to party". As a man, this would be a red flag to me that says you are not ready to settle down yet. There is no reason that you can't party with him, though it would be very different than just being young and free. Be honest with yourself, because this could determine how the rest of your life plays out. There will be other boyfriends, and other loves, but only one youth so use it wisely. I'm by no means advocating partying over settling down, but what you don't want is to get restless when your 30 and suddenly decide you need to cut loose and recapture some of your youth. I lived through that nightmare and it is very ugly indeed. Just do what is right for you, and it will be right for all involved in the end.

Please listen to Spaniard. It's obvious from your post that you aren't sure if this is the route you want to go yet. The fact that you're asking these questions tells me you need to wait awhile.

Originally posted by: YourEternalRest
Based on what you're saying, you're making age a pretty big factor in your situation. How old are you and how old is he?

I'm only sixteen, and he's about to turn 24. We've been together for quite some time, my parents love him and all, he's got a great job...he's really something, and I wonder what he sees in me sometimes. But I guess that's why I'm here for help...it's hard to know if I'll EVER find someone as perfect as he is, but I just don't know if I can do all the things I want if we get married...

What are you wanting to do that marriage would keep you from doing?

Originally posted by: Beagle
What are you wanting to do that marriage would keep you from doing?

*Sighs* he's a very...loving and overly caring boyfriend. He's never really had someone thats not hurt him like me. I've not done one bad thing, but yet he still doesn't like me to go out with my best guy friends. He always jumps to the worst with my guy friends...

I'd want to go out partying, dancing, just hang out with the guys. He doesn't like me to do that NOW, I'd hate to see how overly 'caring' he is if we were married. Not saying that it's a bad thing, it's kinda cute how huffy he gets over it all, but I don't want to marry him and then turn around and worry him to death if I do what I want...the last thing I want to do is worry him, or hurt him

This is a question that comes up fairly often in counseling. The only answer I can give is "Are you ready to live with this the rest of your life?" You're a girl, and he's a man. He's wanting you to take on the behaviors and responsibilities of a woman before you're ready. I'm seeing too many red flags already, especially if you feel he's too controlling. I think this one goes on hold until you're older.

Beagle is correct. Also, you're sixteen years old and you're already thinking/worried about marrying this man. You've also shown that you have some doubts about what you think you should do. I think you already know the answer but you're afraid to act on it.

Originally posted by: YourEternalRest
Beagle is correct. Also, you're sixteen years old and you're already thinking/worried about marrying this man. You've also shown that you have some doubts about what you think you should do. I think you already know the answer but you're afraid to act on it.

You're right, I know the answer, but I am afraid to act...when am I ever going to find someone as great as him? I don't wanna hurt him...I know he's going to fast...but I'm to afraid he'll get mad, or I'll hurt him if I tell him my thoughts. He's a very great guy, and can get girls at a drop of a hat, so what if he drops me? *Sighs* I guess I just have to be brave and hope for the best...

You're 16. He's 24. Stay where you are and party.