Ask Dan & Jennifer

Have you tried telling him that?.. Telling him trhat you want to talk to him, share things with him, want honesty? :confused:

Cruchuu: It kind of sounds like you may be into something over your head. Are you from another country or do you have a learning disability? Do you have a trusted friend you can talk to?

It's not a good sign if he's trying to isolate you. I think you need to build up a support group.

he knows that i have feelings for him and i feel alone i need him im his wife i expect alot from him.He is very dry and unromantic acutally its purely arrange marriage our first month was also not really good but from next month all problems starts he start ignoring me and give time to his family . i thought might be we both were having age difference thats why it all happening with me due to age differences there is also hell of difference in our school of thoughts. now a days we are not living togehter he is quite and dnt call me neither come online or text me im getting more frustrated.he talk to my brother in law that im out of country when i will come back after 2 months then i ll see what to do.....its really very painful for me why its happening with me why he is doing all this with me ? what he want to do? my family said you will not go back to him now if he dnt care for u if he dnt love u if he is nt sincere with u if he dnt give importance to u if u dnt exist in his life he is so stubborn but my problem is i dnt want to destroy my married life my home i want him back i love him i need him but if i ll go and beg him to come back then might be he ill come but he will never give me that respect which i deserve and he will be same and this will be pain for me life time........if i will live with him i ll suffer if i ll nt live with him again i ll suffer now u tell me what should i do???????please please hellp me

Crunchuu: One of the sad facts of life is that we can't change another human being. There's no one who can make your husband love you and act differently toward you. In reading your posts, I'm convinced that there's more to the story than you're sharing. That's your right, of course, but in reading between the lines I'm very concerned.

You are going to need some flesh-and-blood support. The internet can be a great place to get information, but it's not very good for an arm around the shoulder. Since you're not getting support for him, then you need to reach out for it. I don't mean support in the form of an affair or another man. I mean reaching out to friends, a counselor, a church, somewhere you can get the nurturing and support. Given that you're married and vulnerable, I think you should look for this from other women.

You don't say this directly, but I wonder if he's not trying to isolate you. That's always a dangerous sign. If that's happening, you definitely need to reach out.

Crunchuu, given your letters, I'm not sure how much you understand about the situation. I think you need to reach out to someone who can help guide you through this situation. Again, I think this needs to be a woman who isn't under the "control" of your husband; one who has only your best interests at heart. I know there's more going on here than you're willing to share, and that's fine. You need someone to whom you can share all the facts, so they can help you understand and deal with this situation. I hope you reach out and get the support you need.

Marriage is everlasting love. If he don't care or love you, why worry about ruining the marriage? I am sure you can do a lot better.

If he doesn't love you and doesn't care about you, you should leave him. Don't let that kind of situation or else talk to him tell him all about what you like and what you don't like about him.

This sounds like a big cultural difference. Since you entered into an arranged marriage, though, you must be fairly compliant. The situation sounds miserable, though, and you won't get any support from his family.

I suspect you either have to decide whether to stay with him despite this abuse or you have to leave him completely. You can't expect him to change - he was like this when you married him. And why should he change? He's happy the way he is and you stay in your place.

Where is your family? Will they help and support you if you leave him?