Is my boss is flirting with me?

in Singles and Dating » Flirting, Seduction, and Pick Up Lines • 3 years ago

I've started getting to know my boss a little bit better lately. We banter back and forth and engage in slight casual conversation. At first I didn't think much of it. I figured he treats everyone the same way. Within the past month or two its taken a different turn. He's much more casual around me and I feel as if I'm now being treated differently than my co-workers. For example, if he's having a rough day, he'll yell at everyone, but around me he'll instantly become nice and mirror my image. I'll usually stand my ground to him. In all honesty, I don't believe he's ever been outwardly mean towards me. If there's three of us around he'll act very formal vs. if its just the two of us. He always talks about how great I am. If he needs help, he'll usually ask me before the rest of the team (there's about 100 of us). He recently told me that I looked "cute." That's when my heart sunk and I realized that he might actually like me. He's married and so, after that incident, I shut off completely. I no longer know how to act or think. What should I do? How do I know if he's flirting and its not just my imagination?

Replies(2)

harobike1..

maybe

3 years ago

Seems to me that it could be sincere flirting, but he may just be trying to sort of create an work environment that mirrors his home life. I read in some psychology publication that our brain is wired to make every environment in which we spend a lot of time equivalent to a home/family. So in other words, the person in the cubicle next to you might subconsciously be viewed as your sibling, your coworker from marketing might subconsciously be viewed as your cousin, so on and so forth. What I'm getting at is that it may just be a way for him to create a "family" at work, and he may not even be aware of his different behavior towards you.

As far as advice though, I'd try to set up a conversation with him, and explain in mild terms how you feel like there's a difference between how he's treating others and how he's treating you. Depending on what his answer is, tell him that your not interested in a relationship with him, unless you are, and try to set up some boundaries.

danandjen..

Re: Is my boss is flirting with me?

3 years ago

As always... Your gut knows! Listen to what you feel to be true and it probably is...

If you feel that he's flirting with you and treating you differently, then you should trust that and set boundaries accordingly.

But I don't know if I would do the "we need to talk" thing - unless he doesn't respect the boundaries that you set up...

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