Ask Dan & Jennifer

yeah you might be in a friend zone but if your someone that she can talk to and relate to she might see you as more than a friend.and if you dont think that it would put your friendship i danger ask how she feels about you like a brother or as someone that she can see being with. and you might of missed your chance already because you waited. i hope this helps a little

I would not give a kiss good night. Dont move to fast. To me it looks more like you are just friends. But I could be wrong. If you asked her 3 times and she said yes each time she really want to be with you. anyway good luck.

Originally posted by: ambrosius
There is this girl I haven't seen since graduation, three years ago. Back then, she was dating someone but I couldn't help but notice trying to get my attention (I could be wrong). She'd sit next to me and make conversation, she could have chose to sit with her other friends.

Anyways, to the present, we had some brief online chats about how we're doing in life and she'd end off each with a suggestion that we'd meet up.

You're a lucky guy. It just doesn't get any louder than that! Girls are used to getting hit on by guys all the time, that's just the way of things in our culture. So they rarely lead guys on if they don't want those guys to pursue them.

Originally posted by: ambrosius
I didn't take her up on her suggestion the first few times, till just recently. I set up the date and time, we chose a public coffee shop, and met up. Had a great conversation for about two hours, but no hugging/touching. However, other signs (if they are signs) we both looked into each other eyes as we were talking leaning in, smiling and laughing. I chalked up that night to a friendly get together.
I asked her out again and she accepted, but as the day arrived, she said she couldn't make it because she had company over. I may have been too forward or something as I suggested going to the amusement park. I suggested another day, she accepts. This time will be like the first, drinks together at a different place.

This is good, keep doing what you're doing. Those interactions you're talking about - the extended eye contact, laughing, good rapport, those are signs of attraction!

Besides, you know it's there, you're just looking for proof positive, and there's no such thing. As I keep saying, the human mating ritual is infinitely complex, and we confuse ourselves by trying to put labels on it. Go with the flow, enjoy what you're experiencing, and keep slowly taking it up a notch. Spend more and more time together, start doing stuff that's a little more intimate / one-on-one, etc. If the chemistry is there (which it seems to be) then it'll blossom.

Originally posted by: ambrosius
If she was someone I'd just met, I would have come to the conclusion that she is interested. Since she is a former classmate and friend, I don't know. I could be in the friend zone. What can I do to see how interested she is? The kiss goodnight?

No! People are people are people. The fact that you've known her and she knows that you're ok (i.e. not psycho, dangerous, heck, maybe even ok to be around) is a big plus for you. That makes all those signs much more powerful, not less so.

So go forth and take it to the next level - do more of what you're doing and take it up a notch very slowly and gradually. Just make sure she knows you like her "that way"... flirting is OK. A woman wants to know that you're attracted to her, it's ok. I'm not talking about the neandrathal "nice ass, babe" approach, that'll just result in solo masturbation. but if you like her, it's ok to show it... with the extended eye contact, the occasional touching, holding her hand a second or so too long when you hand her something, etc...

Let us know how it goes!!

I'm still confused about the situation

We went for drinks again and movie & dinner since (nothing bad about them). I should have made a move but I didn't a bug mistake I think. I can probably get one more movie date though but feel so friendzoned now. I have to make the first move, I felt like I could have made a movie last date and nothing negative would have happened. It feels discouraging, as I could have sucked it up and held her by the shoulder/arm or something.

She has already given out red flags when I asked her out before and I persisted by trying just once more later and got to those dates. First time, she gives a "no," second time, it becomes a yes. When I asked her out again, she used a red flag answer. If I ask a second time, it feels like it will be a yes.

I'll just sum it up that she is not as interested as I first thought.

when i date someone i expect some sexuality as well... and i don't mean that you should get in bed on the first date, but it is important for me and my girl friends too.
otherwise i just start to take it as a friendship and it's hard to bring the sexual part in relationships then.

i hope you get what i mean...

Hmmm this one is a little tricky.

Since you guys have know eachother for a little while it could just be that she is being friendly and wants nothing more than friends.

The only reason why she would not want to be more than friends is that she doesnt feel the attraction for you.

So instead of drilling her with more questions and trying to get her to logic it out, work more on creating attraction.

Don't ask her out formally anymore. Just call it hanging out. Tease her. Start using confident body language and get past the personal touch barrier sooner rather than later.

That doesnt mean do something sexual, that just means when you might put yoru hand on the small of her back when you are walking to point her in the right direction or graze her hand when she makes a slight remark.

When a girl is interested in you. You wont be confused.