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So I've been dating this guy for a little more than 6 months and things are going pretty well. It looks like he wants to get pretty serious with me, but I feel like his ex is an obstacle for us. A few months back we had a conversation about our past relationships, and I remember that whenever he spoke of his ex, Tina, things got....weird? He would get very emotional when talking about her, especially about the break up. He's even told me word for word that he still can't get over the break up. He was completely head over heals for this girl. Not that I doubt that he likes me or anything. His friends and family always comment about how "whipped" he is for me.
I know he doesn't know he's doing this, but sometimes I feel as if I have to compete with her. He would tell me how much his family loved her and how pretty she was. This would make me feel like I'd have to compete with her to be better and it'd hurt a lot. Many a times he's said that we were similar and that things I did reminded him of her. I don't know if this is out of sheer stupidity and cluelessness or if he's comparing me to her, but either way it would get me a little upset inside.
I've talked to him about this before. I've told him that sometimes I'd get jealous whenever he spoke of her, but his response was less than reassuring. He got extremely quiet and had nothing to say. He said that me and Tina were about on the same level(whatever that meant) and that just made me feel worse. I want to be better, not on the same level. So i asked him instead that if he had the opportunity to get back with her, would he? Now this took him a while to think it over, but he said he'd rather not go through the hurt of breaking up with me either to get back with her. I mean something like that should have made me feel better, but it didn't give me much reassurance. I don't know what to think of this. Should I be worried? Is he still too much into his ex to completely move on with me or am I just being paranoid?
I know he doesn't know he's doing this, but sometimes I feel as if I have to compete with her. He would tell me how much his family loved her and how pretty she was. This would make me feel like I'd have to compete with her to be better and it'd hurt a lot. Many a times he's said that we were similar and that things I did reminded him of her. I don't know if this is out of sheer stupidity and cluelessness or if he's comparing me to her, but either way it would get me a little upset inside.
I've talked to him about this before. I've told him that sometimes I'd get jealous whenever he spoke of her, but his response was less than reassuring. He got extremely quiet and had nothing to say. He said that me and Tina were about on the same level(whatever that meant) and that just made me feel worse. I want to be better, not on the same level. So i asked him instead that if he had the opportunity to get back with her, would he? Now this took him a while to think it over, but he said he'd rather not go through the hurt of breaking up with me either to get back with her. I mean something like that should have made me feel better, but it didn't give me much reassurance. I don't know what to think of this. Should I be worried? Is he still too much into his ex to completely move on with me or am I just being paranoid?
