We are madly in love with each other BUT...

in Love and Relationships » Relationship Advice • 3 years ago

Hi,
My boyfriend and I met 3 yrs ago at work and we became best friends and fell madly in love. He's Christian and I'm Hindu. Religion played a big part in our breakup; he said he doesn't want me to convert but that, because he allowed our relationship to be built on the wrong foundation (we had sex with each other before marriage a lot of times which is against both of our religions... and we confessed to his elders), and that if we are right for each other God will bring us together. He said that he doesn't know what it would take for us to be together. I told him I had no problems going to church with him regularly and praying together, but he says that he needs to learn to live his life according to what God wants and not what he wants, and is having a hard time distinguishing between the two. But he insists that he loves me incredibly, and feels that if he were to pursue our relationship, it would be because of what he wants and is not sure that that is what God wants. We love each other dearly, we see each other everyday at work and we are both incredibly hurt because we are not together. He said he's not happy because of our breakup, and I myself have been miserable since we broke up (about 3 months ago). How can I use the secret to mend our relationship if at all? I've listed all the things I want in a relationship and they all include him.. is that wrong? I don't even want to get married anymore if it's not with him. Where does God come into our lives to make us work and how much effort/ responsibility is on us? Right now he doesn't want to talk about if we may ever be together because he said if we are meant to be together God will make it happen. Advice on anything I might be able to do/ utilise the secret to helping us?

Thanks in advance.

Sharon

Replies(2)

Beagle

Religious differences.

3 years ago

If you're having these feelings, the possibility of marriage is always there. Everyone thinks they can overlook their differences in the love and passion of dating. I'm sure the two of you can look through that difference. When a child comes into the picture, a whole new set of problems emerge. Remember, the other person has been trained his whole life that if his child doesn't follow in his faith, that child will burn in hell for eternity. Whether or not your believe that, he does, and i guarantee this issue will come up if you have a child.

Please, make sure that the two of you are clear on this issue before your proceed. From someone who's been there, done that, and got the scars.

All Christians think that God brought them and their significant other together. Christians also have a very high divorce rate. Be very alert to magical thinking, especially on his part. I'm a psychologist, and I have the sad job of trying to help people get their lives back together after experiences like this.

I hope I haven't come off as negative. I've just seen the pain that can result when people have differences like this. This is a conversation you need to have with him. It's better to decide now if you can or can't live with this difference the rest of your life, than after there's a child in the equation.

femaleorg..

Use lots of positive emotions

3 years ago

to supercharge the signals you send out to the universe. Create a "vision board" of the life you want with him. Send him green love energy from your heart chakra to his heart chakra. YouTube "chakras" for more details.